The Grace We Miss

Maybe because we rush through everything that truly matters.

“Hold yourself to a standard of grace, not perfection, always remembering you don't want to get to the end of life and find that you lived just the length of it. Live the width of it as well." - Linda Clark

Why grace, you may ask? Because … imagine a world with more kindness, more respect, and more grace. For a moment, transport yourself there and imagine how marvellous life would be.

Let's examine…

How hard is it to be graceful? My dad was a gentleman. I remember when he used to court mum. Boy, it was something to see! Nothing was out of reach for him, and everything had to be right. I remember spending time with him as he got ready for dinner with the queen who had his heart.
Mum had just returned from Italy and this would be the first date they had together since she's been gone. She looked glorious and people noticed. And so did Dad.

“How do I look, kid?"
"Fine, Dad. You look great, really!”
I was 9 or so, I had no idea what's good or bad, except for what I've seen in those 70’s sitcom reruns. Like “I Love Lucy".
He combed his hair every which way it would go, only to eventually comb it back to its original form. He must've tried 24 ties, only to finally pick the first one.
At the mirror, he turned right, then left, then backwards looking over his shoulder, gangster-style, cigarette dangling from his mouth.
I laughed and laughed and laughed. He was amused and winked at me from time to time.
Then again:
“How do I look, kid?"
“Fine, Dad, you look great!"
“You sure?"
“Of course, Dad. You do, seriously."
“Yeah, sure. You'd say anything …but I don't know about these shoes…”
“What's wrong with them?"
“I don't know, that's the problem. I think I prefer the brown and whites better. They go with the coat nicely. See?”
And he turns from the mirror, changing one shoe while leaving the other one on the other foot.
“There. Which one?”
Frozen with indecision, I must have had the look of a deer caught in headlights because he just ignored my would-be answer and proclaimed, "Yep! These are the ones! Thanks, kid!”
I was relieved as if my team just won the championship…
Grace. He was a graceful man and demonstrated it with the ladies at every chance he got. To him, to be a man didn't mean to be tough or loud or commanding. It was to be suave, charming and kind.
My mum saw those qualities and to her, they were irresistible. Just like he planned.

In our society today, we seem to have forgotten about grace. In fact, if you ask anyone young enough to understand its meaning, they wouldn't be able to describe it. They would mumble something like “what women have” or some similar nonsense. But in reality, they don't have a clue.
Old ladies get amazingly impressed when a young man cedes his seat on the bus or keeps a door open for their entrance. The smiles on their faces speak volumes and tell a story of gratefulness and appreciation that nothing can buy.
The same takes place with an old timer, a grandpa who has seen better days. We will be there too, soon enough, and our appreciation will remind us we are all one in this cyclical movement called life.

Me? I was lucky enough to witness grace first-hand, learn its attributes and enjoy the rewards without knowing. Because that's the thing, the best things in life are to be experienced without expecting returns.

—∆—

Until we meet again,
Love and light ❤️🗽
René